STEALING FROM THE RICH AND GIVING TO THE POOR

I must say that whenever I get off the metro to go to my house, I secretly wish that a pedicab will be waiting for me right outside the metro. Pedicab rides are my favorite mode of transportation! Especially because I am a bag lady (meaning I always walk around with more than both of my arms full of bags)! If the spirits-of-wish-come-trues bless me with such an honarble presence, I'd be jumping for joy. The thing is, it almost never happens. Pedicabs are not always where I want them to be, when I need them.
In my fantasy world, the air would smell like my DKNY apple-icious perfume, everyone in town would ride bikes with no handle bars while they say hello to strangers, and pedicabs would be on every corner-every block-ready to take pedestrians to their destination via environmentally friendly green style pedicabs....
Earlier today after a hard days work, I met a friend for dinner at Jack Rose, a new bar/restaurant on the corner of U and 18th street. I was tired so I said to myself "man I really wish there was a pedicab outside of this place so I don't have to walk home...."
Hot diggity bulls eye smack in the konk! I probably am the luckiest girl in DC....because at the bottom of the hill next to the Adams School graffiti-esque wall art, I see a yellow Living Social pedicab with a pedicabber who I'd never seen before. He took me around at tazmanian devil speed, surprisingly made me laugh, asked me questions like "what is the craziest thing you've ever seen on a pedicab"...and didn't even charge me!... How could this be? I know every pedicabber in this city and I don't know this guy! He also insists that we don't pay him.... hmmm... I thought I was the only one who gave free pedicab tours here and there....
Later on, I come to find that there was a secret hidden camera connected to the pedicab! They have just taped the entire free ride and Living Social is starting a blog for "whats going on in the city"... Good thing I didn't talk about my plans to take over the world! And by that, Pinky, I mean my plans to take over the world of site seeing, and by that I mean my plans to being DC's rightful Robin Hood-stealing from the rich and giving to the poor----and by the rich I mean--the rich educational recources of information. By steal- I mean aquiring knowledge... and by knowledge - I mean valueable information that you-----would want to know.....
on that note:
* lets get more pedicabs out there and use them for transportation to and from
* lets starts being nicer and waving hello to someone new every day
* lets start experiencing DC on a bike... get a perfectly good condition bike for less than 150 dollars at "The Gold Factory" mention my name and get a special discount. call 202-538-7292. Biking is healthy, fun, and awesome. It's at your fingertips. Capital Bike Share is all over DC. There are 110 share locations in this local area. Take advantage of the city and be good to your body and environment.
Rent a bike here:
Capital Bike Share Site
http://www.capitalbikeshare.com/

Buy a bike for cheap here:
The Gold Factory
www.goldfactorydc.com
call 202-538-7292

Mad Dawg's favorite eatin' spots while on the pedicab. Particularly for quick & good deals, casual ambience, and good food (in no particular order):

1) Chinatown Express (746 6th St NW) - there's a cook with a chef's hat standing in the window making homemade noodles & dumplings. i always get the BBQ pork noodle soup. $6.50 gets you noodle + meat or veggie soup & hot tea or bottled water AND awesome embellishments, including the crazy green mystery condiment.

2) D.C. Food trucks (parked on various streets of D.C.) - food trucks have taken off in the District as the sought after meal, and are often a good deal. follow them on Twitter and Facebook or ask a pedicabber perhaps ... where one might be parked on any given day. they are especially easy to find in the Northwest quadrant during the weekday lunch rush. sample all kinds of cuisines in all kinds of forms. i am partial to the Fojol Brothers of Merlindia & Benethiopia who travel in flashy costume around the city in their magical rolling music-blasting buses. they're serving tasty, spicy or not (Indian & Ethiopian) fare ... coming soon to a curb near you. check out a Twittery feed of trucks here: http://projects.washingtonpost.com/moderation/twitter/dc-food-trucks/ and try Googling "DC food trucks" to see what is going on.

3) California Tortilla (728 7th St NW) - for when you want Cali-Mex that originated in Bethesda, MD. no seriously, they have great friendly service & offer specials. i've been taking advantage of their movie ticket deal all summer. mmm... carnitas. oh pork! spend $7.50 pre-tax on food, and you can buy a Regal movie ticket for $6.50. the theater at Chinatown-Gallery Place is right across the street & their tickets usually go for $11.

4) Taqueria Nacional (400 N Capitol St NW) - for when you want authentic Mexican tacos & fresca fruit juices, amigos. it's a popular little taqueria serving breakfast & lunch & is close to Union Station.

5) Five Guys Burgers and Fries (808 H St NW, 1100 New Jersey Ave. SE & more locations) - yum yum. famous for their juicy fried griddle burgers with crazy amounts of free toppings. but i rave about their fries because they are most excellent. i douse them with Cajun or Old Bay seasoning & malt vinegar & then shake them up in a paper bag. if i'm not able to eat them all in one sitting, i throw them in my cab & they are actually still good hours later. please tell me what other fries are good cold.

6) Urfa Tomato Kebab (740 6th St NW) - oh man, they have good falafel. & great doner kebab combos (that is lamb & beef meat w/spices, not human meat) stuffed in homemade pita bread. with fries or chips & a drink, it's only $7.27. that is a steal in D.C.

7) Ruby Tuesday (712 7th St NW) - it's way better than you remember. that all-you-can eat salad bar is essential when you have a pedicabber's appetite.

8) Justin's Cafe (1025 First St SE) - i split pizza w/other pedicabbers at this pizza/salad/sandwich joint when i am pedicabbing the National's baseball games. they have cool weird brick oven pizzas like the Pickney, with candied figs and prosciutto. also check out their micro brews on draft & in cans, along with a full bar.

9) Capital Q (707 H St NW) - a bbq joint in Chinatown that serves delicious Texas-style bbq. Yelpers give it mixed reviews, but after eatin' all kinds of bbq across the U.S., i find Texas bbq to be an outstanding mastery of smokin', juicy, spicy goodness & this spot is in fact smokin'. several meats & sides to choose from.

10) Harry's Restaurant (436 11th St NW) - they have outdoor sidewalk seating! & they give 10% off discounts to both pedicabbers & passengers. plus, their pitchers of Dogfish Head 60 Minute IPA are a dang good deal (for D.C.).

PEDICAB SONg by Shaady

As a pedicabber and a lover of Washington DC, I must admit that I am obsessed with pedicabbing. This is the reason why I started this company. Since I love pedicabbing so much, I free-styled this song about pedicabbing and recorded it on my i-phone…. listen to it… It is… one part ridiculous, three parts passionate, two part facts, and one part fib. Most pedicabbers would appreciate this song… let me know what you think…

Count Her Fib Money--Don't let this happen to you!

COUNTERFEIT MONEY---CIRCULATING THE DC AREA
DONT LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU I SAY....

Tonight I engaged two young U street urbanites in a tour of the lovely Lincoln Theater and  Ben's Chili Bowl. Thanking me with soulful "OOOOs", "AAAAs", and "dayam girl you strong like Her Cule Lease"...they paid me with a hundred dollar bill which included a chunky tip to my surprise.  I gave these generous lads sixty dollars in change and deservedly decided to indulge my thirsty turtles in a delightful drink at 'Wonderland" with some living socialites.

 As I paid for my drink with my new crisp hundred dollar bill, I scanned the bar for attractive lads that I would perhaps converse with about donkeys and elephants that roam our politically charged zoo of a city. Unexpectedly,  I was jolted aside by the bartender who angrily demanded for my arrest....

"This Bill is fake. You take me for a fool?", he shouted. He squinted his eyes and called for security, "Get this girl out of my bar!"

Defensively, I pulled away like the sly swift flying squirrel that I am and quickly retreated into my shotogun Bruce Lee horse stance I learned from my dad in Karate. Putting away my "WHY-I-OUGHTTA" knuckle sand which fists, I quickly calmed down and was overcome with a sense of self righteous punk rock Patrick Henry... "DUDE!!!! I demand you let me go at once!!!!Give me liberty or give me DEATH!"  I said.

 Suddenly, the bartender transformed into the Queen of Hearts...

ALAS

In Wonderland, I stood stooped n stumped
while the beats of my heart skipped, startled and jumped
On the Grill, heated,
this bill had me cheated
the counterfeit fibbed me
I didn't site see it!

cuffed slung n criminally treated
cops would have me arrested and seated
 in the back of a police car,...
instead of my pedicab

NOW...what would my mother say?

 OFF WITH HER HEAD
 he said!
and i Wish it a dream
so I'd roll out of bed

But it wasn't quite that my Destination DC BLOG FRIENDS!!! This really happened.
I was astonished by this unjustified aggressive behavior.... While I did not get arrested, I had my counterfeit 100 dollar bill snatched from my possession. I explained how I had been paid in this new crispity crunchity bill. I had no idea it was counterfeit. For foolish, fib infested,  counterfeit  MONEY which is circling the DC area like the Bubonic Plague---an epidemic of the past, let this be a lesson from the sly swift flying squirrel... Shaady... your Destination DC Tour Guide.

DON't let this happen to you. Educate yourself!
Destination DC Quiz:

1. What is US Dollar Bills made of?
2. When the new 100 dollar bill was made, did business owners and consumers have to turn in their old bills for their new ones?
3. Where is the Federal Reserve Seal located on the NEW 100 dollar bill?
4. What was changed in the new hundred dollar bill to make it harder to counterfeit?
5. What building is on the back of each new 100 dollar bill?

Here is a video about how to tell the difference between fake and real 100 dollar bills...